As everyone with a computer and half an index finger knows, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2 broke about five box office records in its first three days on-screen, leading the way to a 169.2 million dollar total. That’s three days. In the USA only. Around the world, chalk up another 250 – 300 million. At the midnight premieres they gave out 3D glasses shaped like Harry’s. Then fanboys and fangirls everywhere oohed and aahed at every pretty flashing light and squealed at every vacant sigh. When it was over, they all went of facebook and proclaimed it the greatest work of acting, directing, cinema, in the history of movies. It was the best reviewed, (probably) highest-grossing, and apparently most well like movie of the series.
In other words, it completely, totally, unequivocally average in every possible way.
You heard me. How about I use a few other words? Generic. Ordinary. Normal. Boring. Rushed. Abrupt. Jolting. That enough for you? Are you confused? I’m sure you are. Can everyone just lift the veil of ‘ oh my fucking god it’s ending…??!’ for a moment and watch that movie without the fanboy / fangirl bias? It was a sloppy mess created by the series’ worst director by far. Apparently David Yates thinks he can do whatever he wants without regard to the source material whatsoever. And that would be okay if his alterations were any good. My favorite scene from Part I was one of his creations: when Harry and Hermoine were dancing alone in the tent. But for this he became the anti-Midas. Everything he touched rusted and broke. The best thing about this movie was Alan Rickman’s performance, which was the only thing Oscar-worthy about this piece of nondescript fluff; he story was rushed and the producing was flawed.
Part I put so much on the table. It gave this movie an incredible head start, a solider-than-concrete beginning, and the potential to end the series with an awesome bang. Instead, Part II took Part I’s magic and wasted it in the first five lackadaisical minutes. Everyone had an open mouth at the end. Most were screaming praises. The ones who actually watched the movie were saying, “this is it…?” One thing’s for sure, possibly the greatest literary and cinematic franchise of all time just whimpered over the finish line. Disappointing. That’s really the only word for this slapdash movie. Disappointing.
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